MOST OF OUR MALE FOLKS ARE NOT HOME WELL TRAINED, SOMEONE JUST SAID, hey! SHUT UP! OK, I HAVE HEARD YOU, BUT BEFORE I SHUT-UP. can you please read to the end, I promise to shut up thanks.I think is high time we remind our society that the lack of training our male children who we dim BIGGER or see as the leaders, heir, head, pilot, kings and all in all is having a very negative impact on our society, is high time we recognize that copying and emulating is quite different from training, grooming and nurturing. Being competence is not by gender,is not by being a man or a woman, but is by people who worked on becoming competent, through doing the right thing by people who need to do those right things, those people are parents, family, friends and society but falling to do so, it has left a big hole that I don’t know who among us can fill, is either you, me, or even the so-called mothers whom most of them the men so much love or their better half can help.
This is because our males folks live a life of emulations and we see them doing the same thing the older men (GENERATION) they are emulating did, not minding how good or bad it is, if it was, because no one is telling them, it is good, bad or need to be changed, because the distance between them and I in the same society is quite much, it keeps repeating itself from generation to generation and we, in turn, suffer for it, if really children learn by what they see, not what you say to them, then there’s an urgent need to train our men folks thoroughly for better society or!.because on them lies a lot of responsibilities Like we claim. Then we need to equip them very well, not just sending them with this mindset that as men they already have it, know it, remember we all came into this world innocent and open, we are shaped by the people around us and by the experience of our lives and lives of other people living around us no wonder they (MEN) have this ownership mentality, they lay claim even over what they have not merited, including women just because they are men big trouble for “dead body”. Feeling too big to be humble, so proud and arrogant or even to tender an ordinary apology to fix things back where is needed. Does king beg? for where! after effect of this has shown in the life of so many of most men, who can not handle rejection or have staying power with easy from women/life itself, then I asked them, must every woman you won’t want you, must you have every job/work you desire, when that work/job/women they desire don’t come people around them suffer for it, funny enough, they don’t even want some of those women for real, rather for eating, most of those men feel that women are created for their satisfaction, as a man I must have that women, job/work, even when you are not competent abi, oh my God! and if such women say no, we have hard stories of acid bath, killing, beating and molestation, rituals to meet up in life instead of applying staying power, which the suffering, extends to family members not only the women or man why?First, I need to remind us, am a Nigerian then an African and a human being, ready to impact my world/society, this is to give you an insight into the background from where am writing from and for more understanding so pardon me if by any means I have to offend you through this writing.
These set of people (male folks) that have this over exaggerated view of themselves, each time I stare at them, I feel for them, first because of the way they are wired, their nature as humans and whom they are and what the environment/society has turned them into, I don’t know if is just my environment or is it a general issue, because I write as an African like I said earlier. They find themselves, always in battle with self-haven made to believe that they are super humans to deal with yet not.
Unfortunately many of them don’t know this/while few do, but honestly, it actually calls for concerns, that is if you will agree with me, if you like, well, they will always say, perception is free, let’s assume that, this is my our own perception as a person. Am free to perceive, am I not, go joor, he/she laughs, remember is my world.
So please allow me to write, if you wish to read nice, but if not, still nice, thank you. My time, my money(Data/device) and my brain through God. but I beg you to read please so as to impact others and our world for good biko.
If truly that whenever a human being is born by psychologist or by nature we agree that, that baby is empty, innocent, open and whatever thing we programmed into that baby, is what it, the baby will use to form a character/attitude, reasons, pending on the environment, peer group, family, people around which totals, sum up to society, then in return projects back to us, then am of opinion that the society in return are getting in full force what they have by generational programmed into the lives of their male folks, children, yes! because is obvious that about 75% of our male children are not trained at all, if I say it my shoe no go lost, even if it gets lost, you can buy me one or won’t you? answer me first, hahahaa, you remember my favourite colour.
Most of them live a life of, what I called copycat, they only grow up to emulate the closest male figure around them, being it, father, uncle, brother or male friend around them, no wonder we keep recycling the same life style, character, attitude and Reasoning, culture outside the way they are wired as men (human) in fact in figurative word, we don’ train our male folks, full stop.we
Please, we need to start training them, even so, many of them who know they have these problems won’t owe up to it so as not to be seen as being weak. Society has succeeded in letting them know that men don’t own up to mistakes, invariably t me what it means we are telling them is that men don’t make mistakes, what!, I got so upset seeing a cousin of mine in Texas with different attitude/behaviors, I never believe it was him and honestly I was expressed. only for him to get back to African and is like putting up his old clothes back and I was like uncle is this you, he was like don’t you know am an African Man, then I asked him what about those put up at Texas, he was like, do you want to kill me, so doing the right thing is killing Nah, just an innocent question due.
What a chauvinism way of reasoning, we unconsciously instIll in them, in our male folks and in return it hurt life out of us. then we cry, cry, cry babies hahahahah.
Small story of what training could look like, I remember watched a grandmother quarrel with their Neighbor when her grandson of about 7years old watch, then the next day as he walks home back from school and walked past the woman without a word of greetings and his grand mum asked him, why he did not greet their neighbor and he said because you are quarreling with her and her grand mum took him inside the house and admonished him that for life he should not ever try that in his life, that is her problem and he should leave it for her to deal with and gave him a sound of warning not to repeat sure act. that even if she fought with someone, he should greet them it melt my heart.
Each time I write, I don’t undermine the ability of Thomas on my page, criticizes, professor or analytical minds and beings coming to do their own work here, I respect you guys, because no man is perfect, carry on but remember is my world.
Back to our male children, First, no human beings on earth is a super human, but we always tend to make our male folks believe they are super human, they are thought, not to cry even when they feel like crying, they say it makes them look less a man, oh mayo mayo! We tell them, You are a man so you are a leader even without having leadership qualities or attributes, they tell them you are the head, even when their heads are not well placed on the heading position, oh my Jehovah! this has unknowingly created this bottled resentment within them that no one knows that kills them quietly, so many men live with a lot of embattled war that not even you or I know matter how great we are can help them or settle it, they have a lot of unsettled scuffle ravaging them which affect their peace of mind too.Why because 75% of them will not accept it even the ones in our religious setting. we unconsciously inculcate in them that as men they are mandatory leaders, rulers, the main man, that’s why anything they desire/want they must have it, no wonder many of them rape their fellow female counterpart even when they don’t want to, that push of is my right, (ownership mentality manifest) to have whatever I desire, want have dwelled in them and live in them, they even kill people unknowingly because they live with this mindset that all I want I should have, society practical cause it and is a big problem society have created for them and they can’t help each other, both them and society are reaping it slowly, even most of the men who have some natural intelligence, you see this culture override it, no wonder some of them battle with self in their place of work but once they are home, that real self-surface, sorry But i must tell you that 75% of family problems in my society is as a result of this but no one dears say it rather we pushe it to women.. women are always on the receiving side.
Many of them (MEN) lack control and discipline, tell me? men speaking now! As a leader what do I need discipline and control for, when I am, all in all, the almighty, After me every other person comes, am the best among others even unconsciously mat it out to their fellow men, I feel for the men folks check the number of this new suicide in town, now is more on them, they are like why can’t I, we make them believe that things will come to them effortlessly because they are men, says who, no! is not in their dictionary, rejection kills many of them. why rejection is part of life.
No wonder in my area this world “Am an Africa man” for years I have been looking for things to justify this mentality, reasoning and behavior, Africa man mentality that has been racking my society, African man this, African man that, but yet to find out, please if you have a prove for this my curiosity, tell me to save me out please, because am still dying to find out more about it.I most times feel for this male folks or can I say cry for them, for the mind battle they fight always just trying to battle this big load the society/culture have placed on them, because whenever a leader goes wrong, the followers must go wrong too, could it be the reason we are where we are today, just asking?
As a man, they always live to meet up, then I ask? meet up with what! they are always trying to prove a point! Jesus Christ, so arrogant to be human and learn or accept mistakes, as a man is a crime to make mistake in my society hey, men don’t make mistakes oh, which has ruined so many of them and it has kept them in the place of agony, funny due many of them know it but so well place in their Ego to accept it, Ego thing, no wonder many of them still watch themselves crushed into pieces, many men wish to die than be what I called human or lower themselves to their maker or accept their mistakes, his fellow men will even call him a fool. check our corridor of power how many men can owe up or step back.
I might not say much on this because so much to be said about our failure in training our male children who are today our man, fathers, people we look up to and the effect is having on us/society is alarming. Am not saying it for you to accept it, but just to say it for posterity sake.
But a quick one, we have this attitude that we transfer to them by always telling them that they are men(YOU ARE A MAN) OH, NWOKE! miji, abaya etc, to us, there are things men don’t do and things they do and in return we cry that our men are doing us but we actually did them hahaha, forgive my language here, why we are the ones who did them by denying them home training, we failed to groom them as humans and we shout at them that they did us.
Check in your area, your religious setting, village, etc how many training groups do our woman have for why none of our men, our women are always getting better on daily basis, meeting up with new life and changing’s of the world, upgrading themselves, but our men remain at the same level and with that same generational pattern, they only converge to elect to lead/rule, others and themselves, drink and The irony of it is to lead most women who in truth are more sound,well groom/informed and well trained than them, for us or for them, they/we assume they know it, know what? in our religious, no wonder few who observe that differences try to make some women rule or guide them the men, they feel so dehumanized that a woman is leading/guiding them, is even seen as a crime in most areas, if you will be truthful to yourself, you will agree with me that many men in our corporate world today live with this resentment that women are their boss, it reduces their efficiency and input at work. Many men are not happy at work not because they don’t like the work or the pay, but for the fact that a woman is their boss takes away something from them, it disorganizes them totally. How can a women lead me, you hear things like my father said is a crime, a crime what! half of the things she knows, you don’t even know it, just because you are a men, they should give it to you to mess it up, just the way you have massed your family up in the name of being a man why you have a competent wife who should have helped you turn things around for both f you, but know! am a man, okay …..
No wonder most families suffer a lot and have repeatedly encountered setbacks, because our men will not allow their wives, sisters or aunt say it, be it or do it, they want to say it, do it or be it and be there, even when they are inefficient , coconut head, even when you and I know that this man is an ’ iti’ ode, sorry oh, eh they know they can’t deliver, but always wanting to insert authority which they don’t have and messing things up for them and others just because they are men, I must because am a man, many homes are in dilemma just because of that attitude/reasoning and has ruined them and others and will continue to, few men who understand this differences and give the women in their life chance to operate, have name in my society, the fools call them (woman wrapper) why they are the real, wrapper, not even woman own because, A woman wrapper is neat, sorry but is a reality. no wonder some women who know the ability of their men will not allow their men mess up things for them, cause of most family problems, they call such women “oke nwanyi” we should remember that God gives us a brain to work with and those who use theirs, God comes for them, not because of who you are, is not a gender thing. check out even some women who did not get these home training at home but because we have a lot of training for women on daily basis they get better by leveraging on them but our men feel too big to sit and be trained is a taboo to train the kings hahahahahaha.
For someone, who will doubt this write up and said not training our male folks is not issues to our well-being, life, culture and society look out to our world today. and how few who got that well home training has been celebrated and how it has reflected on their life, finance relationship and health and society at large. is not by making much money oh.
One question I have for you now, that is doubting, is, why do we always undergo serials of training for our business as GM, MD, CEO, SENATORS, GOVERNORS, PRESIDENT ECT does it mean that leadership can be learnt, just asking you Mr Thomas. But we don’t take time to train our male children who are our leaders but our attention is more on our girl children no wonder most men cannot meet up with their wives or girls counterpart rather always struggling to suppress them the girls/women child and as an African woman, you must kill your ability to make a way for the man to excel in this jet age ok ooo. and we want to meet up with the world.. some major problems in our home front today still the same problem of not accepting the truth. and most women who have refused to suppress or kill their ability are seen as being too wise, is only in Third world country you can hear the word of being too wise. Even in marriage, they will tell you don’t marry her, she is wiser than you, still, my people can ask ourselves questions, why will this small girl be wiser than this man that is older than her or her age mate, rather you here things like a women cannot be bigger than a man to marry, so marry him and kill your ability.
Then we have a coconut headman and a bright woman living in the house as husband and wife, if the women is that type who cannot pretend, to hide her intelligence, problems must surly occure and family members will come and blame the woman, sorry society.
Please, let’s train our male children, for the character, attitude, emotions, patience, tolerance and endurance, more importantly, that leadership we enforce on them needs thorough training to catch up with it, ok, na una sabi. IN MY SOCIETY PATIENCE IS A VIRTUE ATTRIBUTED TO WOMEN ALONE, BUT I TELL YOU IS ONE THING EVERY ONE NEEDS FOR SURVIVAL IN LIFE, STILL PART OF LACKING IN TRAINING.
OUR MALE FOLKS ARE NOT WELL HOME TRAINED.what we unconsciously instil in our male folks is power, not to be afraid, is that training? no wonder our military force kills anyhow or will even faceless policy still boils down to lacking of training.
A small tip, check families that have all boys where the mother doesn’t have any girl child she has no choice than to train some who did not let the societal belief, influence or interfere get into him/them or constantly reminding him/them, (that his a man, am a man) or some boys who live with their grandparents, or single mothers alone they unconsciously get the best training but wicked society will always try everything to snatch that good home training out of them, now is their choice as individuals. most time these men know they have messed up but society have told them not to owe up to it hey.
Abeg let me be going jari.
Thanks for stopping over to read
BEADYSWORLDSHOW- CHANGING YOUR MINDSET
A small tip, check families that have all boys where the mother don’t have any girl child she has no choice than to train some who did not let the societal belief get into him, or constantly reminding him/them, (that his a man, am a man) or some boys who live with their grandparents, single mothers alone they unconsciously get the training but wicked society will always try everything to snatch that good home training out of them. now is their choice. most time these men know they are mess up but society have told them not to owe up to it hey.
Abeg let me be going jari. Remember it is exceptional but we are talking about much percentage, so is an issue ok. I shut up now.
Thanks for stopping over to read
BEADYSWORLDSHOW- CHANGING YOUR MINDSET